Insecure Writer’s Support Group
This is my first post for #IWSG. I’ve been working on being a writer for a long time now. The road has been bumpy and a few times the pavement has given way all together. I remember the testing done in high school, the kind that’s supposed to tell you what you’d be good at and steer you down the right path. They didn’t like me because I didn’t fit into their puzzle boxes, so to speak. I was creative. Big Strike against me. They’d rather I showed up with a sign pointing, this way to the librarian staff, or this way to road crew. In retrospect, the librarian choice might’ve saved me a few heartaches but then when I was a teen I learned that all the positions at our local library were volunteer but for a few.
I spent a lot of years trying to fit in. From school to jobs to life. Nothing quite worked. Due to finances, I only finished two years of college. But I came home with a dream. I wanted to do this thing called writing. Trouble was, I didn’t know how. This was before the internet and all the writerly tools it now offers. I wrote and I wrote but I had no clue how to get better or where to send my work. Then marriage came along. I married someone who was jealous of anything in life that took my attention away from him. My family. The kids. Writing. He broke down every area of my life until, at last, by some miracle, I found the strength to stand up and walk away with the kids.
Writing as I’ve often said here, saved me, gave me an outlet again. I worked odd jobs supporting the kids and me. Finally in 2009, the idea to pursue writing seriously came to me. This time, I was prepared for the work involved. I read craft books, researched, found critique partners and then a wonder crit group. I learned and I grew. I’m still doing so. I’m not quite where I want to be, but I’m so much further than I’ve been. There is hope, there is the fighting spirit in me that refuses to give up, there’s the determination to get better with each passing day. So I sit at the computer and tap the keys, ready with my ideas that’ve grown into stories. I don’t know the whole road yet, but I know I can travel it. This is my future, the career I always dreamed of. Don’t let anyone tell you to pick something that categorizes you. Tests are good but there not the end-all determiner, that’s us. Go with your gut. Fight. And never give up. You can be anything you want. No matter how long it takes.